Turkey Leg Meltdown

The Challenge: USA
Season 1, Episode 5 “In Tyson We Trust”
Original Air Date: August 3, 2022

You’re never too old to bamboozle.

Five episodes into The Challenge: USA’s inaugural season, the show got what it’s been missing – unbridled rage born out of betrayal, the kind the cast will have to deal with in the next episode because finally, a team that was blindsided-ly sent into elimination won… And just when I thought all the people with big enough egos to react to being blindsided, like Shan, Tiffany & Xavier, and all the people with enough gameplay sense to adapt after being blindsided, like Shan, Tiffany & Xavier, were eliminated, Sarah responded to Tyson’s blindside like that. Does she also have the strategic skills needed to mount a comeback? 

The “Perfect Algorithm” Algorithms Perfectly:

The Algorithm, or The “Perfect” Algorithm as T.J. has taken to calling it, divides the 20 remaining Challengers into ten new partnerships. While I’m most intrigued by Shannon & Kyland – After being paired up, she reacts in a way that requires censoring. What could she have said? Oh, shit? Oh, fuck? And if so, why? – I’m most excited for Angela & Danny, a team of too-cool pro athletes, but they don’t get the screen time I hoped for… Mostly because, as usual, Tyson is the episode’s star, and rightfully so. His performance in the challenge was so incredible, I haven’t calmed down enough to write about it yet (and it’s 3:00 a.m. Sunday morning)… By extension, his new teammate Cashay gets her share of screen time, too. 

There’s also Sarah, sucking the air out of nearly every scene as she trashes her new partner Leo. It’s a continuation of the trash she talked about him last episode, so of course, The Algorithm paired them together now. It is perfect, after all.

Survivor Strong and Exes’ Swan Song:

Like always, (Can it be “always” if it’s only been five episodes?) we check in with a handful of teams/people, each a varying degree of relevant to the episode – Is it just me, or is the storytelling structure already starting to get predictable? Not like the MTV show, nothing could be as narratively heavy-handed as that, but a structural shake-up halfway through the season might not be a bad thing… (Remind me of this in two weeks, when the structure is inevitably shaken up by some terrible twist or cliffhanger ending, and I complain.)

First, there’s Cayla & Derek. Given Derek’s Big Brother connections, the duo’s shared affability, and several cast members’ desire to make “big moves,” as long as they don’t finish last in the challenge, neither thinks a trip into elimination is likely. Derek’s indirect implication that voting him & Cayla into The Arena isn’t a “big move” is funny, self-aware, and accurate.

Elsewhere, Cashay tries to explain to her ex Cinco that when he flirts with other women in the cast, it hurts her feelings. We see Desi rubbing sunscreen onto Cinco’s back. We see Azah and Cinco cuddling on a lounge chair. Of course, we see highlights from the old Tiffany tapes too. In response, Cinco says it’s “weird” for this to be the first conversation he and Cashay are having after not speaking for 48 hours prior.

Finally, we stop by the Survivor alliance, where the only thing looser than Ben’s braids is his loyalty. Though he, Tyson, and Sarah appear to trust one another, behind closed (interview room) doors, Ben expresses doubts about his ability to work with Tyson long-term, as well as a desire to finally beat him in one of these damn challenges! Out in the open, Sarah tells Tyson that if he “bamboozles her” (even though she’s the one who’s voted him out of Survivor, twice), she’ll take it in stride. “I’m too old to bamboozle,” Tyson responds… But is he genuine, or is this simply the first step in a grand bamboozle?

The Challenge:

During The Challenge: All Stars 3, T.J. stressed the significance of the franchise’s brutal water-based events, like the “Air Pockets” challenge in Battle of the Bloodlines or the “Think Tank” elimination from Final Reckoning. In “Barrelled Treasure,” this episode’s challenge, teams are tasked with swimming back and forth in a straight line four times. Several contestants barely manage.

First, players jump off a barge into the water, or in the case of Enzo and Leo, gingerly climb down a rope ladder, then gently lower themselves in. Next, teams swim 150 yards to a row of buoys, one per pair. (Why measure in yards? Because this is The Challenge: USA!) Printed on each buoy is an eight-digit Binary sequence. Pairs memorize their numbers, then swim an additional 75 yards to a cargo ship with 100 barrels on its deck. Of all the barrels, each team’s Binary sequence is printed on the lid of only two. If you open a lid other than your own, you & your partner must swim back to the buoy, then return to the cargo ship to try again – That’s an extra 150 yards 137 meters of swimming!

Teams that open the correct barrel will find puzzle pieces inside. Swim the pieces all the way back to the barge, climb up, and deposit them at a puzzle station. Then do the whole thing over again, only this time, open your second barrel, which contains more puzzle pieces. All together, “Barrelled Treasure” requires, at minimum, about a half-mile of swimming, which sounds a lot more impressive/difficult than any amount of yards.

After they’ve transported both sets of pieces, teams can begin their puzzle, an oversized tangram. First pair to finish wins 10,000 Challenge Bucks to split, safety from elimination, the ability to vote one team into The Arena, and an exclusive contract to host the show starting next season. (One of those prizes isn’t real – Can you spot the fake…?)

“Barreled Treasure,” though not the most excitingly designed challenge, successfully jumbles qualities from all four origin series:

1. Picking two barrels out of a hundred and incurring a penalty for choosing incorrectly is like the half of an Amazing Race Detour you shouldn’t pick. 
2. Survivor challenges are often swimming-forward.
3. The water at the challenge site has the same disconcertingly opaque quality as the water in the hot tub on Big Brother.
4. On Love Island, contestants are given a lot of options (people to date), then choose among them, not unlike choosing two barrels out of a hundred.
   
   A masterful encapsulation of all four shows…

While several duos are featured during the challenge, either for swimming well (Cayla & Derek), for one partner swimming poorly (Azah & Cinco, Kyra & Enzo, Sarah & Leo), or for swimming just okay (Angela & Danny), none of them are worth writing about in comparison to the segment’s stars, Cashay & Tyson. First, it looks like they’re assured last place – They’re the only team to open the wrong barrel, though it seems like Cashay accidentally slips into one, and the lid slides off, as opposed to misremembering their Binary sequence. Regardless, Tyson is pissed. He’s cursing, and when he & Cashay do eventually retrieve their first batch of puzzle pieces, he frustratedly chucks them at their station. It’s a bad-attitude-look, but it’s still waaay less harsh than he was to Sierra simply for existing on Survivor: Tocantins. 

In interviews, Tyson resigns himself to losing, and talks “just swimming to finish.” The extra trip to the buoy should be especially time-consuming for him & Cashay because Cash is one of several contestants who can’t swim. But the difference is that Cashay also doesn’t try to swim, at least not on her own. She floats on her back, kicking her feet like a “motor” while Tyson pulls her through the water as he swims normally. The motor technique, coupled with Tyson’s seemingly limitless athleticism, propel him & Cashay into fourth place as they return to the barge with their second set of puzzle pieces. On their way, Tyson passes several castmates while pulling Cashay through the water – And he thought breathing through his nose while running was demoralizing!

On the barge, Cayla & Derek, who beat their castmates in the swimming portion by what felt like eons, have already spent twice as long tinkering with their tangram. When they started solving, they were the only team around. Since then, another half dozen duos have shown up, Cashay & Tyson among them. Cayla tells us that she & Derek are both so good at puzzles, trying to combine their techniques into one approach is a struggle. (What?)

As Cayla & Derek work on their team chemistry, Cashay & Tyson win the challenge. (What?!) Tyson scoops Cashay into his arms, twirls around, and yells “That’s why you never give up!” Usually, I roll my eyes when a reality TV contestant spouts off an overused platitude, but I felt it coming from Tyson. I was on my feet, staring at the television, shouting “Oh my god” over and over. Did Tyson just gift us the best performance in Challenge history since Landon carried Carley to the Fresh Meat II finish line?

While he & Cashay celebrate, the other non-swimmers (Azah, Enzo, and Leo), the ones whose partners couldn’t swim for them, sink their teams into a sad race for last place. Eventually, Kyra & Enzo emerge as the best of the worst with a third-to-last finish, thanks in part to Kyra’s supportive attitude, but in larger part to an Enzo redemption arc wherein he quickly and confidently solves their tangram. That leaves Leo & Sarah and Cinco & Azah, who’s so exhausted, she can barely stand on her own. She & Cinco lose the challenge, sending themselves into the upcoming Arena. At least Azah has the Bible to tell her that her terrible swimming was actually a strength, or something… 

As for the winners, Cashay & Tyson each earn 5,000 Challenge Bucks. Cashay joins the growing roster of women qualified to take on T.J.’s Final, but she’s the only one to do it via a swimming challenge and an inability to swim. Tyson widens the earnings gap between himself and the rest of the cast, almost half of whom have yet to bank anything other than the complimentary $1,000 T.J. gave everyone in the series premiere – What if something comes up and he has to ask for it back?

A Name That Starts With “B”:

At the Compound, Sarah is quick to criticize Leo to whoever’s willing to listen, or not listen. She’s the type to complain that she was “robbed of her chance to compete,” to blame every misstep on her partner, but when she gets the opportunity to compete solo, she still doesn’t win – That’s basically what happened during the “Hang On, Man” challenge: While her partner Cinco stood on a balance beam, Sarah solved the word phrase and was in total control of how quickly they completed the challenge. Angela & Kyland won…

Meanwhile, ahead of their conference with Cashay & Tyson, Cinco advises Azah to stay quiet, especially about who she’d want to compete against in elimination. Cinco’s convinced that Cashay will “manipulate” anything he & Azah say so it can be used against them later… but like, how? Not only is Cinco & Azah’s partnership about to be over, but there’re also four people at every winners and losers conference. Even if Cashay tried to “manipulate” Cinco’s words, there’re three other eyewitnesses who can correct her. But most importantly, the image Cinco presents of Cashay – cunning, spiteful, and plotting – doesn’t align with what we’ve seen of her in these early Challenge: USA episodes… Frankly, I wish it did sound like her, because then there’d be more villains around to back up Tyson.

At the conference, Azah & Cinco are silent-as-planned. They won’t suggest a team they want to compete against – They won’t even suggest a team they don’t want to compete against. As a result, the meeting is short and uninteresting, but it leaves Cashay & Tyson with an entire cast of potential targets.

Feeling significantly less safe than she did at the start of the episode now that neither her nor her partner Derek’s origin shows are represented in the power duo, Cayla approaches Tyson to ~talk game.~ She tells him that “someone” who should be a member of the Survivor alliance is frustrated that he keeps winning challenges. “Does their name start with ‘B?’” Tyson asks. In an earlier interview, Ben did complain about his inability to beat Tyson, but I wish Cayla made it up – Watching people on reality competition shows believe lies because they fit their perspective is incredibly satisfying. Ben & Tyson’s relationship was rocky on Survivor: Winners at War and were it not for Sarah, I don’t think they’d be Challenge allies. If Cayla knew about the Ben/Tyson animosity and used it to craft a lie that’d convince Tyson to target Ben instead of her & Derek, it would’ve been *chef’s kiss,* but her using the truth to accomplish the same thing was cool too…

The Arena: 

Without to-do, Cashay & Tyson reveal that they’ve chosen Sarah & Leo to compete in elimination against Azah & Cinco. Another blindside, and a big one too! So far this season, only Cashay & Domenick expected to be voted into The Arena, and that’s partly because Dom mopes around before every elimination anticipating getting thrown in…

Via flashback, we see the impact of Cayla’s talk with Tyson. He tells Cashay that he wants to target Justine & Ben, but Cashay puts the kibosh on voting for an Islander. Instead, Cashay suggests choosing Sarah & Leo, both because of, and not because of Sarah. Cashay doesn’t want to eliminate her, but all Sarah’s complaining about Leo scared Cash into never wanting to be his partner. Tyson agrees because, as Danny explains in my favorite interview of the episode, on Survivor, if you want to “take a shot at someone,” you don’t target them directly. You aim for their closest ally first. For Ben, that’s Sarah.

As she prepares to compete, Sarah trashes Tyson for playing Survivor four times, but only winning once, seemingly forgetting that she played three times, and also only won once. (In fairness, she does usually outlast him.) Leo chimes in to call Tyson “disgusting” for voting him into elimination, especially since Leo sees him as a “big brother.” Problem is, it doesn’t seem like Tyson also thinks of Leo as his little brother. It doesn’t seem like Tyson thinks of Leo at all – It’s the CBS version of the one-sided Wes/Josh rivalry…

The Arena game is called “A Dark Turn.” While attached at the waist, teams enter a pitch-dark shipping container. Inside, there’s a stack of four different sizes of prop film reels. Multiples of each reel type are scattered around the rest of the sand pit. Teams memorize the stack inside the dark container, then collect the necessary reels from the sand and recreate the stack on a nearby pole. First pair to finish wins.

As someone with an obliterated short-term memory and poor spatial reasoning skills, this might be the most difficult-looking elimination I’ve ever seen… Not for Leo though, it’s obvious the game was rigged for him – He talks extensively about not just liking cats, but actually being one, and you expect me to believe that his competing in the darkness-based elimination is a coincidence? 

Throughout the beginning of this season, I’ve been in suspense multiple times wondering who would win in The Arena… not during “A Dark Turn,” though. When the elimination begins, Azah & Cinco sprint into the shipping container, but Sarah & Leo find/study all four reel sizes in the sand pit first. It was decided in that decision which duo would win, and things only got more obvious – Leo invents a numerical naming system for him & Sarah (It’s categorizing the reel sizes 1-4), while Azah’s strategy is to label the reels “tiny,” “small,” “medium,” and “big.” Later, the crowd suggests that she & Cinco use their fingers to measure. When Azah responds by waving her hand vertically in the negative space between both ends of a reel, it was clear that no comeback would be made. Truthfully, I never understood Azah’s Challenge casting (since she could barely handle Big Brother‘s carnival games), but it’s a blow losing Cinco. He was a supportive partner, a franchise fan, and a powerhouse who never got to compete in a purely physical challenge. I hope he gets to play again, ideally in a season where his ex isn’t one of the stars. That way, he might finally get some screen time…

Though Azah & Cinco were almost nonfactors in this elimination (and in the season overall), Sarah & Leo’s win is still largely owed to Leo’s problem solving. Will his impressive performance convince the women that he’s not the worst partner to ever put on a Challenge jersey? Probably not. But Sarah likely convinced most of the cast not to cross her. To celebrate (if you can call it that) the win & the $2,500 in her Personal Challenge Account, Sarah mean mugs Tyson and then some. She snarls at him. She points. She does the “slit your throat” motion. She, as Tyson describes it, “munches on a turkey leg.” It’s the wildest win reaction since Laurel thought she beat Ninja Natalie in a climbing competition. Once again, Leo chimes in to tell Tyson about the big bro/little bro stuff, but no one seems to care – Maybe The Algorithm will one day, but for now, it’s staring at Sarah & Tyson with a strange look in its eye, and I think it’s… salivating?

Leftovers:

-These “Previously on” segments are getting out of control! At the beginning of this episode, Shannon & Domenick have a sword fight that ends with her stabbing him to death, all just to say “Previously on The Challenge…”

-The best part about the origin-show-based alliances slowly crumbling is that we’ll stop hearing contestants describe powerful people from other shows as “insurance policies” when they’re paired with them.

-During her montage of Leo-gripes, Sarah says that she “doesn’t mind carrying extra weight, but won’t carry someone else’s.” …Where’s the extra weight coming from if not your partner…?

-At the conference with Cashay, Cinco, and Tyson, Azah says she could “cut the unresolved closure between Cash & Cinco with a spoon.” At first, I thought it was the silliest misfire of a common phrase since Nelson’s “needy greedy,” but then I realized that it’s only half-silly. The spoon part tracks.

-Why did Tyson think Sarah & Leo would lose an elimination to Azah & Cinco? Could he & Cashay not agree to vote for any other team? Were people anticipating a hands-on, physical Arena game since there’s yet to be one? Did Sarah convince the cast that Leo was that terrible…? At the same time, I’m not sure Azah & Cinco could’ve beaten anyone in “A Dark Turn…”

-Currently, there are four women eligible to compete in T.J.’s Final: Alyssa, Angela, Cashay, and Justine. But so far, Kyland and Tyson have shut out all other men from qualifying. Together, they’ve won all five challenges, so no other men have earned the $5,000 prize, and because no men have earned the $5,000 prize, none of them have any money to steal in elimination either. Obviously, it won’t be like this forever, but it’ll be fun while it lasts! If Tyson earns 50,000 Challenge Bucks before the season ends, finale drinks are on me!

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Thanks for reading! Come back next Tuesday for another Challenge: USA recap!